depression blog

Depression Won Today

Depression won today and told me I was worthless. It told me I couldn’t do anything, that I am nothing and should just stop trying all together.

Depression won today and robbed me of my relationships. It got in the way of me communicating with my husband and made me feel misunderstood. Depression made me a stranger to my daughter as I stared and watched her play. She barely looked my way and I had no energy to intervene and say, “I’m here.”

Depression won today and took away my body. I sat on the couch for hours on end and then a few hours more.

Depression won today and I lost my appetite. I forced myself to eat and timed my meals because I’m responsible for another life other than mine.

Depression won today and took away my ability to bond with the growing baby within my womb. I didn’t have a single conversation with my baby, nor did I have the will to reach down to give a gentle rub. In fact, depression tried to convince me I’m not even pregnant anymore, or┬áthat I don’t deserve to be.

Depression won today and consumed my entire my mind. It made me carve out goodbyes in my head and made me think I’d be better off not here.

Depression won today and watched me cry for hours. It didn’t offer any condolence or even try to understand my side.

Depression won today, but today is only one day. Tomorrow when the sun rises, I will battle on again.

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