Toddler in the Wild: Playing in Nature

toddler in the wild

I should really be doing homework right now, but I welcome the break from academic writing (and I'm also procrastinating). This past week I was dealing with a flare in my back and was finally feeling better today. I didn't want to pass up an opportunity when my body was actually cooperating with me. When my toddler said, "I go outside?" we did just that. "I jump puddle" is what I was told. Knowing that she was heading for any amount of collected water, I geared her up to the max - boots, waterproof jacket, muddy buddy! I think we...

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Day 7: Your Motherhood Story

october15

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month! This week leading up to October 15th, I am partnering with fellow loss mama and writer, Liz Mannegren, to help create discussion and raise awareness about this vitally important topic. Journal Prompt: What does your motherhood story look like? Use the #thismotherhoodstory to share it with us! What do you want others to know about pregnancy loss? Today is October 15, National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. Though pregnancy loss happens to one four women, this topic is still not spoken about openly. After my first loss, I didn't share it with...

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Day 5: Helping Your Child Grieve

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month! This week leading up to October 15th, I am partnering with fellow loss mama and writer, Liz Mannegren, to help create discussion and raise awareness about this vitally important topic. This Motherhood Story Day 5:How have you helped your child grieve the loss of his or her sibling(s)? If you have not yet entered this emotional space, what wishes do you have to help your child grieve the loss of his or her sibling(s)? One aspect of pregnancy loss that I never considered was having to help my eldest through the loss...

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Day 3: Postpartum Depression

postpartum depression

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month! This week leading up to October 15th, I am partnering with fellow loss mama, and writer, Liz Mannegren, to help create discussion and raise awareness about this vitally important topic. This Motherhood Story Day 3 Journal Prompt: Take the time to be honest with yourself today. Journal about what pregnancy loss was really like emotionally. What emotions were present during the loss of your child? What physical symptoms did you notice due to your mood? Use as many descriptive words as you can to share your experience. I stood in my doctor’s office...

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Day 1: A Letter to Your Angel Baby

miscarriage letter

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month! This week leading up to October 15th, I am partnering with fellow loss mama and writer, Liz Mannegren, to help create discussion and raise awareness about this vitally important topic.  This Motherhood Story Day 1 Journal Prompt: What would you like to say to your baby? This can be one sentence, several pages, or even a drawing. Take your time. This is your love letter to your baby. Whether you type the letter, handwrite it and seal it in an envelope, do what feels right for you. My Sweet Heavenly Babies, Writing words to...

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This Motherhood Story

thismotherhoodstory

We are one week away from October 15, National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. I’m teaming up with my friend, Liz, who writes over at Mommy Mannegren to help bring light this topic which is sadly still a taboo for many. I met Liz through A Little Light online community, where we were learning more about online platforms. The metaphor used was that our blogs are a garden. If we are the gardener, what are we planting into our communities? It was a really convicting metaphor for me. My hope is that I’m planting a safe place for all...

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The Brave Jar

brave jar

We have been struggling with separation anxiety over here for quite some time. M, my five-year-old, has been struggling with separation anxiety for about two years. One of the biggest separation anxiety triggers for her is when I have to use the bathroom. This started just after the miscarriages. As a three-year-old, she saw me go to the bathroom, and then come out in inconsolable tears. I can imagine she thought something very traumatizing happened in there, which it did. It was the moment I discovered I was miscarrying for the second time. Since then, M has not left my...

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Chasing Light for the Invisible Mom

chasing light

It's May and there is a highlighted day on the calendar this month that may bring along many emotions, especially for those invisible moms. Mother's Day is a short ten days away and for many this is a difficult day to navigate. How can we honour those mothers who do not have a child in their arms, the mother who holds her child only with her heart, the mother who struggles to answer "how many children do you have?" It's easy to celebrate when we have visible children. The world accepts the visible, but what about the invisible? What about those...

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The Death of a Pet

death of a pet

When I went downstairs this morning I noticed that Goldie, our new golden gouramis fish was lifeless at the bottom of the tank. We had only brought her home last week. Naturally, my husband would've scooped her up and flushed her, but we remembered that our five-year-old daughter was not yet home. She had spent the night at my parents' house and I knew that coming home to the death of a pet would create more questions than understanding.  M, our five-year-old, has been faced with more death and grief than a typical child her age. She has had to say...

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Happy Birthday, My Dear Rainbow Baby

rainbow baby

Dearest Rainbow Baby, I cannot believe a year has passed since you have joined our family. Memories of carrying you are still fresh. When I close my eyes, I can still feel your kicks against my ribs, and your punches against my abdomen upon hearing your sister's voice. My dear Rainbow Baby, I have to admit it was a terrifying journey bringing you into this world. For thirty nine weeks while you were in my womb, I had a difficult time connecting with you. There was no doubt of my love for you, but I was so afraid of loving you...

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